Last March many friends from the sangha joined the Awareness Intensive retreat, which took place in Mevlana Garden in between two retreats with Swaha.
The Awareness Intensive retreat is a deep and intense immersion in the process of self-inquiry. The technique is practiced in dyads using the koan “Who is in?” or “Who am I?”: two participants sit in front of each other — one is a neutral mirror listening, while the other is investigating himself/herself by answering the question.
We asked two sannyasins to share about this new experience.
Raidas
How was it for you to join the Awareness Intensive retreat?
The whole program took me by surprise and yet I felt so safe and taken care of — I could just let go and surrender to trust. By sitting in front of somebody who is a neutral mirror, I could really focus on the challenge of meeting myself, allowing whatever was coming up in me and exploring it.
The self-inquiry helped to gain distance from the identification with the energies I felt in myself and see that they are not who I am. As this undressing was happening, more trust was coming, which would take me deeper, again and again.
How did you experience silence after this group?
I was so ready for silence, in a new way. I really felt the invitation to go into silence, with the joy and the curiosity to discover “what is going to come up now?”
Darsha
In what way does self-inquiry help your process?
Self-inquiry is a great support for me to go deeper. I also feel that many of us in the sangha are ready to go into self-inquiry now, after years of active meditations — and also after years of being uplifted by Babaji in the retreats and then losing this focus in everyday life.
The support I receive from the mirrors in front of me is a tremendous help to be in the moment. This allows me to dig deeper and really face myself. Having had an opening during this retreat, I am aware now that this is not something I can do. I can only prepare the ground for it by helping myself to come back to this moment — and then just wait. It is a strong reminder that it is that easy.
How was it to join Awareness Intensive in between two retreats with Swaha?
It was an immense gift. In the first retreat with Babaji we got rid of the restlessness of the body through active meditations, shaking, dance. Afterwards, in the Awareness Intensive, we emptied the mind. Then, in the silent retreat with Swaha, I felt we were more ready for silence. I could feel a new depth in my silence and, in the self-inquiry sessions we had, I could easily start from where I was and go even deeper. In this way, it feels like one whole process — from the start of the first retreat to the end of the second.
Dharma Mountain will host this retreat on July 10 – 13, 2026.
Who am I beyond all images, beyond all appearances, beyond the ups and downs, the dramas of life with which we can get identified? That is the real question.
Return to that pure, boundless space.”
Vasant Swaha
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